breathing

so i think it's ok for me to say that the recent melt down is over. not sure why it came, where it went but i got my joy back : ) i think it's just maybe readjusting to life at home and you know the constant journey of discovering who you are and that really even if you think you're crazy and nothing much makes sense, you're ok. la vita est bella. lol. i'm so funny : )

anyway the last few weeks have been so amazing. i'm so astounded thinking about my time at home at how much people have embraced me in such a short time. not just you know, been polite and hung out with me but embraced me. yesterday was my last day at work and one of the girls there and i were nearly crying, lol it was actually pretty funny. but made me realise a little bit the human capacity for relationships. people actually have really big hearts. really big. pretty cool.

had an amazing day with my brother just sitting in the sun, chatting, napping and watching tv. he's so totaly my hero. he's playing rugby for tasman this year and even got to play in the first game. so anyone who watches rugby, number 5 Rees Logan is my brother and he's the best ever in this whole world.

got to see one of my childhood friend's beautiful newborn baby -Ashton. now, i'm not one for babies or small children, and most newborns are really ugly let's be real here people. they're all wrinkly and can't open their eyes and just cry and sleep. but this baby, Ashton, is so incredibly amazingly cute. just cant get over it. i'm going over to see them after this actually so better hurry up : )

and have just really been able to have some quality time with peeps thats been so special, not really doing much, just sitting around and laughing and crying and talking.

on tuesday i went to the "lunch club" - a bunch of peeps from church or i don't know where exactly but it was awesome. i totally fell over on the way there and there was no one around but this one awesome girl behind me and i kind of tried to laugh it off and not be too embarassed, and she was going to lunch too with the group so it was an automatic bond time of making a fool of myself. but it was really fun, good food, awesome peeps, what more could you ask for?

and then WEDNESDAY! my boss took all the admin team out for lunch and again, good food, good wine, good conversation. and the last few weeks i had to move because a newbie came in and kind of needs to be near my boss and i missed her! and so it was a good chance to catch up and chat before leaving.

AND THEN on wed night went to life group and Andrew (leader) had taken the day off work to cook a 3 course meal for like 12 people and it was amazing, stuffed chicken, pumpkin soup, the works. and we were all dressed up and it was so fun. and he gave us this sheet of paper with all these clues on it as to what the dishes were, and we had to guess what we wanted for each course. so i ended up eating my soup with a fork. it was so fun. and because they're amazing i don't know why, they got me a present and a little book with nice things written in it to tell me i'm cool. and i got to talk to this guy i haven't really talked that much to about social justice issues that i'm discovering more every day are where my heart is. so that was awesome too.

so, about to go back on thursday, to an incredible amount of uncertainty, don't know if i'll be playing polo next season, no meike, no kezia, no alyssa or juliana or christel or kim or liz or brenda and the list goes on. but i'm actually ok with that. so it'll be good.

my dog is getting old, she keeps pooing inside. isn't funny but not. hahaha.

a few friends are coming to visit this semester too so yay! VERY excited about that.

k thats all for now.

A xxox